Do you ever feel like you should be better at trusting God by now?
I do.
I’m 57 years old, I’ve known the Lord for most of my adult life, and I am still learning how to receive His love, trust His leading, and walk in His peace.
This episode began as I studied Romans 9:14–29—particularly the reminder that it does not depend on human desire or effort, but on God’s mercy. I know God is sovereign, but that passage made me wrestle with what my choices, effort, trust, and obedience mean within His sovereignty.
It also brought me back to one of my deepest struggles: How do I know whether I am hearing God correctly? When is it His voice, and when is it simply mine? Looking back at the many redirections of the past five years, I have sometimes felt like the Israelites wandering through the wilderness.
But perhaps every redirection has not meant that I failed to walk with Him. Perhaps some of them have been part of how He has taught me to return, trust, and take His hand again.
As I reflected, I pictured an open door. The Lord stood on the other side with His hand reaching toward me. I could walk to that door, take His hand, and know that I was welcome to return as often as I needed. The door had not been shut. His welcome had never been withdrawn.
Then I pictured myself reaching behind me for another woman—someone who already knows Christ but struggles to feel His presence, nearness, love, or peace. I am not standing on the other side as someone who has arrived. I am returning too.
And together we can say, “Here He is. He has been waiting for us.”
In this episode, I share about:
- Trusting God when I don’t trust myself to hear Him correctly
- The difference between faithful effort and trying to control the outcome
- Feeling redirected rather than certain
- What it may really mean to walk with God
- Returning to Christ instead of trying to master peace
- Leaving the door open behind me for another woman
- Why “Walk with me a bit as we walk with Him” has become so meaningful
I cannot master peace on this side of heaven. But I can continually return to the One who has perfect peace. And as I return, I can leave the door open behind me and invite you to come too.
Walk with me a bit as we walk with Him.
Scripture referenced: Romans 9:14–29
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